seen at the pictures was ehm So I Married An Axe Murderer

was that any good

it was all right it's (unclear) the same (unclear) man you know

aye

quite funny

just (unclear)

I traded in that way I traded in that Wayne's World traded it in for three (pause) Sega Master System games

sure you divn't want mine (laughter)

no it's all right (unclear)

the bin's going to get it soon like (laughter)

(laughter) was that 'bin' or '(NAME)'

the bin it's just sitting (pause) in my drawer (pause) doing nowt so

gathering dust

gathering dust that's what I telt you to keep it for because if you're going to get more play out of it than I am (laughter)

(laughter)

(unclear) like I (pause) asked that lad the day how much he wanted for (unclear) Magi Drive (unclear) a hundred and sixty quid for it (pause) it wasn't bad like he's got seventy games for it

seventy

seventy games

(laughter)

but but how am I (unclear) be able to get my hands on that much money (pause) I goes 'well better ask my dad' and he goes 'there's no way you're spending your birthday money on it'

I wanted the ehm (pause) Mega Drive Fifteen he says a hundred and odd quid (unclear) were about (pause) eight games (unclear) it

I wouldn't pay that like

or my mate was going to trade in (unclear) Nintendo

(unclear) trade him your set

because (unclear) for it because it's getting (pause) getting fixed

that's what my mate does you know (pause) when your game crashes you know you're not meant to clean it with alcohol he cleans them with that and it works perfect

(laughter)

he's like so weird you know the American games

mm-hm

he cuts the sides off the cartridge

(laughter)

(unclear) it fits straight in and they work (pause) (unclear) daft

dodgy

mm

dodgy character

he isn't dodgy he's about two foot tall (laughter)

(laughter)

I haven't played (interruption) (unclear)

(unclear) a dodgy small character

mm a little shifty character

proper little Del Boy

oh yeah did you see that the other night

no (unclear) I meant to set the timer (unclear) but I taped something completely different

I I put a video in the video like I set the time (unclear) but I put the wrong cassette in because I had broke the tab off one of them

then you tried (interruption) to record on it

(unclear) no but I h hadn't realized I'd put the wrong video in

(laughter)

I come home (pause) it hasn't taped and our (NAME) hadn't taped it either so

(laughter) I put it on (unclear) gutted it's like World In Action programme on the other side I was like (pause) gutted because I hadn't seen that one

mm it wasn't bad like

it's a part it was (unclear) two parts (interruption) (unclear) the Christmas one

yeah (unclear) the last time it was on it was just one (pause) (interruption) (unclear) aye

(unclear) little feature (unclear) I liked the one (unclear) they went on holiday (unclear) he goes as a a fifteen year old kid

aye

Tiger Club (unclear) he was standing at the bar (interruption) (unclear) (laughter) he went bumf (interruption)

(laughter) he fell over you know the bloke who plays Trigger

uh-huh

they hadn't told him about that

had they not

that's how they wanted the perfect expression on his face (laughter)

(laughter)

when he fell over

like just see they lift it up the next thing you know (unclear) Del Boy was on the floor somewhere

he just (unclear) went funk (laughter) straight over

aye with the Margarita (interruption) spilt

mm (laughter) (pause) are you ganning out this weekend

no I doubt it

mm

something should (unclear) should go out on Saturday (pause) to South Shields again

are you going to The Venue

got to go to (pause) the girlfriend's concert first though

where's she playing at like

oh (pause) I'll get the ticket off her on Friday I can't remember

you know (NAME) and (NAME) are engaged now that's their engagement on (NAME)'s birthday

(laughter)

it's up at The Comrades (interruption) so

tell you what happened yesterday I was rather gutted I was up you know George and dra Dragon

aye

well I went up to cut through there to get the bus

mm

and it was shut because it was Sunday (unclear) seven o'clock (pause) we walked through and like pushed the door

(unclear) private (interruption) function on

(unclear) so we'd come round

mm-hm

went up you know where like the hippies hang out

aye

(unclear) what was lying on the floor

what

I looked down it was like (pause) a full gold sovereign I just looked at it looked looked at her and she looked at me and she just picked it up and slammed it on her finger and got it stuck so she won't give us it

(laughter)

but that's mine

aye

she says she'll give us it if she can get it off (interruption) (unclear)

(unclear) (unclear)

(unclear) that's (pause) belongs to me

I remember were you there when (NAME) found that ring

(unclear)

years back found the ring (pause) when I was at school don't know how he found that like

the best thing I found at the school was a (pause) pound note that was like full of mud

(unclear)

f first (unclear) says 'right you're buying us twenty tabs' I was like 'no'

(laughter) I found a fiver round there once I was just sitting on the wall (pause) and I was just looked over and I was sitting looking at it (pause) and (NAME) (NAME) came over (pause) (interruption) 'I'm having that kiddo'

(laughter)

(unclear) how can you lose that much money

aye and like someone else find it

aye I don't mind finding the money (unclear) I don't like losing it

my dad lost ten pound last week (pause) he went out with forty odd quid or something and come back with like (pause) ten and he he'd had twenty

aye

before he left (pause) (interruption) (unclear)

(unclear) Comrades like

at the caravan

aye

he was drunk anyway so probably (unclear)

who's the town playing on eh Wednesday

Wednesday

Wednesday (unclear) because there was loads of people came in this morning

oh that'll be for Saturday's match Oldham

Oldham (pause) is it home or away

home

(unclear) I'll not be in town this Saturday (laughter) I'll not be in town anyway because the family's coming tomorrow

(unclear)

(unclear) my mum goes 'you better turn up'

(unclear)

(unclear)

they'll turn up (unclear) go straight to your bedroom

I'll turn up and like (pause) fall down (laughter)

(laughter)

drunk (unclear)

can't believe (NAME) had the eighteenth birthday party didn't tell anyone

aye (unclear) it was it was like nineteen days before mine

did you go did you go over did you

(unclear)

(laughter)

I just knew it was his birthday I wasn't I haven't seen him

oh well I knew (unclear) his birthday (unclear) he telt us he was having a party but he didn't tell us like (pause) when

(unclear) if he had a party I'd love to know who went

well it saved me a birthday present anyway because he all he bought me was four cans of Red Stripe

mm I'll not be (unclear) (interruption) (unclear)

(laughter) (unclear)

eh

I said we're going for a meal

I'm going to the I'm going out for a meal (pause) two weeks after (pause) because like I've got I'm going out on the Saturday night with (NAME)

aye

for her birthday as well and the week after it's their engagement (pause) the week after that me and my mam and dad are going out for a meal

I don't even know (pause) my girlfriend's birthday don't even when it is

couldn't forget (NAME)'s it's two days after mine

(laughter)

it's mad

(unclear) couldn't believe she like she was in my year (unclear) like just realized who she was

actually she knew me from school I'd love to know how

(laughter) (unclear)

(unclear) (NAME) I knew her

(unclear) I I knew her but

mm

like (unclear) that was it

mad (unclear) (NAME)'s boyfriend's not letting her gan to the engagement

(laughter)

because she's put (NAME)'s put (unclear) she says 'oh yeah my mam and dad's going away (pause) they don't want to leave the house empty'

(laughter)

I turned round to her (unclear) 'why didn't you just say (NAME)'s not letting you go' (pause) because we went to (pause) you know (pause) big (NAME) (pause) went to his eh twenty first (pause) no sorry it was (pause) his dau his sister's engagement (pause) and eh she caused a big (pause) he caused a big fuss

(laughter)

he dragged her away (interruption) (unclear) 'bye bye (NAME)' (laughter) (interruption) 'see you later'

(interruption) (unclear) (interruption) (unclear)

I divn't like him to stop it so I wasn't bothered (unclear)

I think it'll be a while before I'm out drinking (pause) like down the town I was out on Friday

I was out at the PTE Social Club

really the Public Transport exec Employees (interruption) or some executives

yeah you know where it is (pause) top of Shields top of Byker Road

no

street round the corner like eh (NAME)'s dad was (unclear) Transport Social Club and I was like (pause) where and he (unclear) he goes (unclear) it's behind Budget Windows I was like (pause) (unclear) bloody PTE you know what I mean (pause) aye (pause) so I got up (pause) I went round and eh (pause) I goes '(NAME) why didn't you just tell us it was the PTE Social Club (interruption) and I would have just come here straight away'

(interruption) was it (interruption) was it all employees was it (interruption) (unclear)

no I was eh (pause) her gran's (pause) seventy seventh birthday

in the PTE club (unclear)

well that's where she lives

aye

up there so she had a big party and the beer was like water

(unclear)

so I ended up sticking to the Southern Comforts all night (laughter) wor lass gans 'oh you're not going to drink too much of that are you' I went

just enough

'no just enough' it's like (unclear) 'you got any Jack Daniels' she went 'no'

(laughter)

I was like (unclear)

yes but it's from (pause) made up with water

aye I gans 'oh a pint of Ex' (NAME)'s dad (NAME)'s father gans 'oh the beer's       ' (pause) I gans 'right' phew (pause) my stomach turned I was like (pause) I couldn't believe it it was really bad (pause) (unclear) it's like you know Macey's on a Saturday afternoon

uh-huh

it was like it's eighty pence a pint and that tasted stronger (pause) than that did (pause) (unclear) stupid man

(unclear) I was just on the (pause) Special Brew on Friday and then (pause) they had no Special Brew (pause) and ehm (pause) went even went into Rosie's Bar man (interruption) it was getting bad

(unclear) in there for

eh it was packed (unclear) 'oh (unclear) you know the Irish Tyneside Club'

aye

'why don't we go in there' I says 'don't be silly man you've got to be a member' so (unclear)

(unclear)

straight over to the

Rosie's Bar

Rosie's (unclear)

should have just went down that little alley (pause) at the side of it getten yourself killed

(laughter)

(laughter)

probably it was eh two twenty two for a bottle of K Cider

that is cheap that like

and then (pause) no it's even cheaper again (unclear) (NAME) goes ehm (unclear) (unclear) go in the Northumberland Arms (pause) but she meant like (interruption) the Newcastle Arms

uh-huh

went in there it was one eighties for just (pause) before (unclear) from there I just (pause) went back to Rosie's because my drink was still there (pause) because my mates were still there

aye

shoved my bottle (unclear) in my waist band there

(unclear)

and walked straight out (interruption) (unclear)

is there any doormen in there or is it just

no no doormen just covered my top over it like that just went in

did you go into the Groat House

no

(unclear) go in don't expect cheap drinks

went to Bourgognes got a wink off this lad so our (NAME) was like threatening to (unclear) him in

(laughter) a wink that's like when you gan to the Rockshot's it's 'hi' (interruption) (unclear) see you later

it was like (pause) lads with (pause) split jeans on and like leather jacket (interruption) (unclear) I was like (pause) '(NAME) he's just looked at me' (unclear) away across the bar he was after chasing him

aye (laughter) aye

he was he was ready to hit him I says 'no (pause) if he does it again you can get him' (laughter)

(unclear) (pause) I wouldn't (pause) (unclear) don't mind them but (pause) (interruption) as long as they keep theirself to theirself (unclear) (laughter) (interruption)

(interruption) (unclear) not when they're like 'hi' (interruption) (unclear) oh eh 'fung'

straight off

hi bye I'm away (unclear)

see I've got (pause) like one of my mates is but he's dead (pause) he's (unclear) they're probably the canniest people you'll ever meet because you know fine well they're not going to        off with your lass (laughter)

(unclear)

aye

we w we went into didn't go into Fat Sam's we went to Sergeant Pepper's (pause) and it was like (pause) it was time by the time we got (unclear) five to eleven

did you see (NAME) at all at the weekend not seen him (interruption) around

(unclear) it was time by the time we got there we left at five to eleven and then we went to the Farmer's for the last one because (unclear) get the Metro (interruption) (unclear)

oh (unclear)

back over (unclear) Farmer's (pause) and (pause) Bourgognes and Rosie's Arms

uh-huh

northu n eh Newcastle Arms

yeah (interruption) Rosie's (unclear)

then Rosie's and then in to the (interruption) Farmer's

(unclear) I normally just stay down the Bigg Market now or gan (interruption) down the Quayside

we were we were going to gan for a pizza but well the first (pause) the first thing (NAME) says right (unclear) my mate's got owns a taxi right his mate

mm-hm

he says if we put a quid in each we can go to Whitley Bay by that time (pause) we decided (interruption) to get our money out he says no it didn't matter (interruption)

(interruption) (unclear) (interruption) no it's pointless isn't it if you're going to gan to Whitley Bay you gan about nine o'clock and make a (interruption) night of it

it was like it was like seven seven of we seven quid taxi (unclear) be enough

that's ridiculous that (unclear) we paid a fiver (pause) from the town to West Denton (pause) that's not bad like the bloke was sound he was like really canny he was nattering (unclear) I gave him like seven quid two quid he must (unclear) he had a really bad night because he was like 'oh thanks pal thanks you're the first person that's give us a tip' I was like (unclear) feel sorry for him I was (pause) half past twelve (pause) so

(unclear) last time I got a taxi from town to here was outside the Haymarket

uh-huh

cost about a fiver you know you know the road down Kenton Bar

aye

he dropped we off there he says 'that's as far as I go mate I'm not going into that estate' (laughter) (unclear)

(unclear) once I went clubbing (pause) and like I wasn't feeling well it's like I got a taxi straight outside the Ritzy didn't see the queue just jumped in the first (interruption) taxi

(unclear) massive the queues (unclear)

(laughter) I just seen the taxi coming straight in the taxi and eh got up to the flats (pause) you know (unclear) road and I goes 'here mate I've only got a fiver (pause) left that's all' he goes like 'you've clocked up to a fiver' he gans 'where do you live' I said 'just round the corner' he gans 'oh howay I'll just take you round' I gans 'oh I've got no more money'

(unclear)

(unclear) gans 'I'll knock the meter off for you' he gans 'thanks' eh we went out on the Saturday night and we got the same taxi driver

and done the same again (laughter)

no so we gave him some money I gave him some extra money (pause) (interruption) for being so nice

you should have (unclear) 'oh I've only got a fiver' (laughter)

(unclear) (laughter)

(unclear)

(unclear) do you ever get in Briggsie's Taxis Gary Briggs he's canny him like

sometimes just get the last bus home or the Metro (unclear)

where's your (NAME) live

Palmersville Forest Hall

aye

it's not too bad the Metro's packed the last Metro's packed (interruption) (unclear)

(unclear)

(unclear)

mm-hm (unclear) trying to get the last bus that's the good thing about the (unclear) they never get packed

(laughter)

the last bus never gets packed

(unclear) shuttle (unclear)

uh-huh or else (unclear) get the seventy one out never get the last seventy one like

(laughter)

you'll never get a seat it's really (interruption) impossible

(unclear) sitting on the roof

(unclear)

(unclear)

uh-huh just strange

so what are you doing in college the morrow

handing in some work (pause) I've been doing

I'm asleep (pause) in my bed

oh that's all right (NAME) just think when you're at work I've got like fifteen weeks off so

been asleep three times the day man (unclear)

you'll not sleep the night like

eh (interruption) (unclear)

(unclear)

can't sleep

(unclear) you can't sleep can't sleep

(unclear) radio

(unclear) you listen to Night Owls

(laughter) I'd rather listen to Love Lines actually

is that still on

aye but it's a bloke's doing it now it's not (unclear)

mm-hm

her voice was just so great then the next thing you know it was like 'right lads and lasses we've got this sort of music or we've got that sort of' (interruption) (unclear)

nearly as good as the hits not homework

(laughter)

(unclear)

or hits not holiday

(unclear)

hits on holiday

or hits it's Christmas or (pause) (unclear) changed round whenever they feel like it

some canny prizes on there like if you win

mm if you win when you hear the lasses they're all sound like twelve thirteen they're like

'hiya my name's (pause) my name's ehm what's my name' (laughter)

aye duh somebody shoot her (pause) what kind of car's (NAME) getting now like

a two litre Skoda

(laughter)

(laughter) a two litre Skoda (unclear) skip on wheels

so what's it (unclear) done traded in the

he's traded in the Peugeot

for the

for the the top model of the Skoda because (NAME)'s already got one the one point six or three

mm

she's getting a two litre

I wouldn't bother me like I really wouldn't bother

I'd rather have the Lada actually the Lada Samaras

mm

(unclear) dad was going to get one before he got the Escort Lada Samara eh Sport

(unclear) like that's what (NAME)'s brother's driving but (pause) (unclear) I think the axles keep dropping

(laughter)

you drive gets to about you do about fifty and the axle'll go crunch

(laughter) bet it's my girlfriend

hi (pause) he's busy at the moment can I get him to call you later

see

aye

who's speaking (pause) (unclear) okay get him to call you later (pause) bye bye

she's going to be like 'what you been up to' (laughter)

eh I was busy (pause) talking

how long you been with her now

(unclear) it off the hook (pause) eh three weeks this Sunday

(unclear) (interruption) (unclear)

three weeks she'll probably go off it (unclear) supposed to be there at six o'clock

(unclear) I was meant to be (unclear) (interruption) (unclear)

(unclear)

so (pause) (unclear) I think (NAME) and (NAME) are going down there the night

are they

so I'll get down there (unclear) not have a bit of peace and quiet (laughter) (unclear) oh (NAME) broke her collar bone (laughter) she was whinging last (unclear) (unclear) 'oh I want sympathy' I gans 'well divn't ask me for any'

(unclear) don't look here for it

you're not getting none off me she goes '(NAME) keeps hitting us' I goes 'I wouldn't be seeing you if I was (NAME)' (laughter) (unclear)

(unclear) a completely different person

(unclear) (pause) (unclear) (NAME)'s ganning 'oh will you not be nice to her for once' I went (pause) (interruption) (unclear)

couldn't even (unclear) nice to her just for a second (unclear)

I couldn't I really couldn't she's (pause) I've never getten on with her she goes 'oh every time I see you you ask us for tabs in the morning' I gans 'you do what' she goes 'every time I see you you ask us for tabs' I goes '(NAME) the first thing you say is hello have you got any (interruption) tabs'

any tabs

(unclear) you're just going well (pause) so (unclear) (NAME) (unclear) 'you always ask us for them doesn't matter if you've got your own or not'

you know (pause) (NAME) (unclear) (NAME) (unclear) bus with

(unclear)

(unclear) taking the mickey out about you and (NAME) (NAME)

aye

that's all right I'll let you off

(laughter) oh I didn't think she was though

(laughter)

I didn't think she was

she says she was (unclear) she's dead quiet when she's by herself she was just sitting there like

I think she's great me

she wasn't even giving the (unclear) for a change

oh she's really canny

(laughter)

(unclear) (pause) just think it could have been nice and peaceful if I'd never getten a bus in the morning

(laughter)

I wouldn't have known her

(unclear)

(NAME)

are you you're sitting on my back seat (pause) that's mine

(laughter) she's she's forward like she's a forward lass

a big lass wouldn't like to mess with her

oh she's (unclear) I was carrying on and fighting with her and when we got off the bus she turned round booted us one

(laughter)

oh (unclear) going to get you back for that so I went in to see her at work really bugging her (unclear)

I'm looking forward to lying in bed for the next couple of days like

(NAME) you're making us sick

(laughter)

it's not (interruption) (unclear)

it's me that's on the sick

aye true actually I get bored of sitting in the house

(unclear) caravan (unclear) double bed

aye (unclear)

no (unclear) I've yet to ask my dad

ah divn't get your way with one ask the other

well why not

true

(unclear) she can come with us she should lie on the other bed I'll just lie (unclear) bed

should get yourself a hard board man

I've got one undernea underneath my mattress but it's freezing cold

put a hot water bottle on it (unclear) lie on it

haven't got a hot water bottle

(unclear)

buy one

buy one yeah

went to the chemist today to get my prescription she says 'Gary (NAME)' I says 'no my name's (NAME)'

Gary

(unclear) it's completely different (unclear) my name was in like block

mm

'Gary' and who's 'Gary'

' my name's (NAME)' (unclear) there like

she says eh 'how old are you' she says I says 'ehm eighteen' she says 'are you still at school' I says 'yes' (laughter) 'yes'

how'd you get away with that like

eh

so you got it for nowt

(unclear) because you know you know when you've got to tick the boxes

mm-hm

I ticked that I was eh n under nineteen and still in full time education but if she asked (unclear) in college but she says 'are you still at school' I says 'yeah' but I left school three year ago (interruption) (laughter)

aye I left school two year ago (interruption) (unclear)

my sp my spirit's still there but (pause) that's about it

oh well my spirit might be there but (pause) (laughter) guarantee I'll never get back in there

no (pause) (unclear) anyway

mm true (unclear)

one week (unclear) week but I wasn't as bad as him (NAME)

that was ridiculous that like

his dad used to just keep him off because he was (unclear)

(unclear) he ha he had a nose bleed in the middle of the night so we're keeping him off the day

in other words I'm going to cash and carry the day to see what else I can buy

mm

see if I can get get another remote control car

he's spoilt like

he's still got them all he's still got the the remote controls

I (pause) keep seeing him he plays with them in the street in the summer

he's got a mountain bike now man (unclear) (unclear) yesterday (pause) I was on the bus like we were (unclear) Westerhope

mm (unclear) like he's got the car and he gans and buys a mountain bike (pause) (unclear) strange people

Plessey goes up to Plessey Woods man

oh aye him and (NAME)

shall we go down to the (interruption) woods today

woods today

no I I was thinking about getting well I had a mountain bike and then (pause) our (NAME) stripped it because (unclear) (pause) his eh son's bike

mm

like I pulled the brake and I went over the handle bars and like (pause) crushed the gears (pause) crushed the gear chain at the back (pause) and the whole the both pedals come off

(unclear) seen our (NAME) he never comes up here anymore does he

no

last time I seen him (unclear) remember when he stood and threw the knife (pause) (unclear) between the spokes chuff straight through his tyre (laughter) that's the last time I seen him (unclear)

haven't seen him for ages

be about four about four or five year ago

tell you who I seen recently remember (unclear)

aye seen him I seen (unclear) the hundreds (unclear) seventy three

I had my eh (pause) Walkman in my back pocket and I didn't (unclear) feel it come out

mm

and he he was on the bus and he (unclear) sitting beside us

aye

(unclear) picked it up and says 'does that belong to you'

(laughter)

he's just getten the (pause) it's an XR Two (unclear) Fiesta (unclear)

mm

(unclear) (unclear)

he's always getting new cars

(unclear) (unclear) the buses

she'll have she'll be having her bairn soon

who

(unclear)

oh aye yeah

still don't know her name

I know but they're dead quiet but they're dead canny

(unclear) dead canny (interruption) (unclear)

they were supposed to come over for my eighteenth birthday party (unclear) they never made it (unclear) surprised (unclear) eh everybody slept that night

oh I was knackered (unclear)

(unclear) was like twenty past two the next morning that eh the next afternoon I got up

(laughter) you like

it was the ninth of August I was like I just slept like for a day and a half (laughter)

it was a good night actually

and the morning

it was a really good night

like we were sitting here at half past six in the morning waiting for the taxi coming for our (NAME) (pause) I had to give him (pause) I I got I got about ninety six pound I had ninety one left because I had to give him a fiver for the taxi

(laughter) did you get it back

uh-huh about three year after (unclear)

(unclear) three (unclear) (NAME) (unclear)

(unclear) three days

three days

it felt like three year

(unclear)

he's just getten Sky in

has he

bought it outright (pause) hundred and fifty six (pause) pound plus fifteen pound a week (pause) ehm month for the films

aye

auntie (NAME) is getting Sky but she doesn't know how she's got it (unclear) you know it's not like cable

mm

so she thinks it's some she's picking somebody else's frequencies up

(laughter)

it's a excellent picture as well (unclear) she says 'what's that big guy called like the big guy who talks like that don't push me' (unclear)

mm

Sylvester Stallone and (unclear) (NAME) says well that was on he says that was eh Stallone Cobra

aye

and ehm (unclear) there was this other big bloke he was like tall he had spiky hair 'I'll be back' (unclear) was like Arnold Schwarzenegger was on last (interruption) night as well

(unclear)

eeh I watch all the old Sons and Daughters and Home and Away and Neighbours (unclear)

I wouldn't bother they divn't get no better when they get (interruption) (unclear)

Eastenders she says you should have seen the plight of some of them (laughter)

(unclear) (unclear) (interruption) (unclear) (interruption)

(interruption) (unclear) (interruption) what

Eastenders

so's Coronation Street it's on from half seven to half past eight

just they're just competing with (pause) each other now

mm I'd rather watch Coronation Street

I wouldn't Eastenders last week was (interruption) classic

(unclear) that's the only time

that was (pause) probably the best ones (interruption) I've ever seen

(unclear) in the papers (unclear) ehm they reckon (pause) if Michelle had been shot she would have been dead because like she had a bullet like a bullet wound there and there was blood

aye

yet yet when they said it was her leg

(unclear)

in the hospital (unclear) Grant smashed over the head he should have been unconscious then the next thing you know he's driving to hospital

aye that's right he was out for the count (interruption) remember

he was like 'I'm not here anymore' (unclear) you know the next thing they're speeding along the motorway

(unclear) they're both hard cases like him and Phil

proper Reggie and Ronnie Krays aren't they

aye

(unclear) them should have been in that film eh The Krays like

no the Kemp twins

they were good like but (pause) it would have been good just to see them

(laughter)

acting (pause) the fantasy out

mm

I like the Krays film I'm going to buy it soon they've just selt it (unclear)

'you laughing at me I'll teach you to laugh' (interruption) (unclear)

(unclear)

remember that was was on the telly that

Channel Four (pause) when it had the banned like not the banned season but like eh (pause) things they don't show anymore

aye (pause) did you see Betty Blue when it was on

no

that was a right parcel

(laughter)

it was the subtitled version it was pure (interruption) (unclear) ridiculous

(unclear)

it was like

did you watch Mean Streets on Sunday

(unclear) what

Mean Streets Harvey Keitel and eh Robert De Niro

no

probably the one of the worst films that's ever been out it's like The Krays but like (pause) with The Silence Of The Lambs in the middle

mm

bad

have you seen eh Cape Fear

uh-huh

that's excellent with Robert De Niro that

I liked in Misery when she's eh (pause) he slammed the type writer off her head

aye

'pituff' ooo (laughter)

so weird man

it's good though (pause) still can't beat Basic Instinct (unclear) that ice pick

mm (laughter) it was just so sick (unclear) good in the opening they're making a Basic Instinct Two

supposedly yeah because like at the end like she's reaching for the ice pick and she

aye she t cracks her arm back oh it was like 'oh (unclear) was that the end'

i i is he dead

is he dead no he's alive couldn't kill Michael Douglas he never gets killed

(laughter)

(unclear)

no

it's like did you see Raw Hide Sunday afternoon

(unclear)

Clint Eastwood in the first one (pause) with Clint Eastwood

was it on was it I never seen it

(unclear) looks really young

that's what he made his eh name in

aye there's a bloke he's the only bloke ever to have hit (pause) Clint Eastwood in a film (pause) and lived

(laughter)

till the end (pause) like not get killed in the entire film (pause) really weird

I liked him in that that Rookie (interruption) when he was chasing

I haven't seen that

he was like there was this car you know the car carriers

aye

he was in one of them and he was like fighting loads of blokes it was (pause) quite funny

did you see the Big Breakfast on Friday morning

no

with eh with all the teeth on

with who

(unclear) (unclear) did you not see the teeth somebody had eh

oh the g the gold (unclear) (interruption) it was in The Chronicle

(unclear) aye well it was on the Big Breakfast on Friday morning

was it (laughter)

aye it eh fifty five year old man rang in

(laughter)

says he wouldn't go back (interruption) (unclear)

on the bed with Paula (laughter) (interruption) (unclear)

(laughter) it was really weird like

I like watching the Big Breakfast like well not Big Breakfast just (unclear)

aye because the I walked in and (NAME) goes 'have you lost your front teeth' I'm like (pause) 'you what'

(laughter)

she goes 'have you lost your top set of teeth' I'm like 'no' she goes 'well do you want these to replace them' I was like 'ah get away'

(unclear) she's like

aye

she was she must have been drunk

oh she's crazy man

she's always drunk they say

who (NAME)

(unclear) she's always drunk come the night time

oh (unclear)

(laughter)

(unclear) she doesn't work on a night time in there

does she not

(unclear) two lads that used to be in their sixth form when I first started (pause) high school (pause) working there I went in once and I c couldn't get moved for old blokes

(laughter)

(unclear) Jesus Christ

it's a proper old man's pub man

(unclear) so it's still a I think it's a great little pub me (interruption) just me

it's a (pause) canny size I wouldn't say it was little

it's just (pause) basically a place to go out and meet people because everyone (pause) it's dead handy for everyone (unclear)

(unclear) man you get half the j Chronicle in there and the reporters man

true you know that

(unclear)

you know that journalist who got (unclear) he's in there every day

even the the eh the paper sellers as well

aye

it's not too bad working for The Chronicle like you get free papers every (unclear)

(unclear)

it's even (unclear) (unclear)

mm

(unclear) like The Chronicle like

they have to keep extending the library and that they keep building

(unclear) big cabinets (pause) massive cabinets holds about three thousand files (pause) at a time on each side and there's like four sides so that's like (unclear) (interruption) quite a few (laughter)

mm I'd get lost me

no they just give you the number and once you get (unclear) it's like one one to three thousand four (unclear) four (unclear) three

mm

it's not too bad it's easy to find (interruption) (unclear)

(unclear) just like cut the paper out and

stick it on another piece of paper and that's it

is that it you get paid for doing that

I was talking to one of the lads (unclear) he's a he plays at drums he's like he's a musician and he's got his own band

(unclear)

he turned down a chance to play (pause) backing all the backing for The Shamen

aye

and then they they before they became actually famous and then he he missed a chance of going for a three month cruise (pause) with The Shamen (pause) and turned it down

(unclear) Bahamas

all over the world

mm I was going to say if it was in the Bahamas that's where he died (laughter)

(unclear)

that's where The Shamen died the lead singer of The Shamen

was it

aye you know where they've got Mr C now in The Shamen

aye

because he took over

Move Any Mountain

aye Move Any Mountain because that was dedicated to the bloke that died fell off his boat

he just he turned them down thr the three month cruise (unclear) around the world he just (unclear) so y he ends up playing this (pause) eh The Tap And Spile and eh (unclear) (unclear)

ugh

I think he was rather gutted because he was going to get like a hundred quid

(unclear)

(unclear)

did you see The Shamen when they were on the Nunsmoor

no it was a free (unclear) (interruption) free (unclear)

aye (unclear) you couldn't see them (interruption) there was like loads of hippies (unclear)

we could we could hear them

eh

we could hear them that was it

I could hear them you couldn't miss them (interruption) (unclear)

they're probably trying to get The Prodigy down there as well

oh they'll never get The Prodigy there unless they paid them

but aye they'll pay them but it'll still be free for us

aye

but (unclear) get there for the hippies

(unclear) actually seeing the hippies actually turning up for The Prodigy with their like

(unclear) (unclear) up for The Shamen didn't they

(unclear) well The Shamen's ambient though (pause) (interruption) and everything

(unclear) it's indie indie band

(unclear)

should just hoy all the (pause) the hippies into The George and Dragon and lock them in just leave them there

(laughter) that's another weird place The George

that's where you can find gold sovereigns

mm

there must have been a fight or something because it was like completely dented (unclear) out of shape (pause) like dented on the (pause) the bottom

mm

so it was like sticking (unclear) the other finger properly get it reshaped

(unclear) put it in a pair of tongs (pause) then open the tongs out (pause) or put it into a pawn shop and get your money for it

(laughter) she says 'I'll sell it (unclear) get plenty of beer next week' I says '(NAME) you sell that and I'll never speak to you again because I want it'

(unclear) she's phoned you for

no she says 'you're getting something (pause) something in the post within a couple of days' because she sent (unclear) off the day

could be a letter bomb

she says (laughter) or a chain letter

mm

she says it's a 'Miss You' card with something else so probably stuck (unclear)

I divn't want to know (interruption) (unclear)

(unclear) with her finger chopped off in it as well

oh (laughter)

(laughter)

little match box (unclear)

a little something for you (laughter)

aye

a little finger with it (interruption) on

finger

she's put it on her wedding finger

why (pause) (unclear)

it's unlucky though

I know like wor lass wears a (pause) (unclear) (pause) (unclear)

(laughter) I just I just want that ring because it would look amazing

I don't like sovereigns

she she's got the same one on the l like (unclear) it's her little finger

aye

it's just a little bit smaller it's a man's and she's got the (unclear) she's even got a man's watch man

(laughter)

proper gadgie

(unclear) I haven't seen her so I couldn't pass (interruption) judgement

you'll probably see she'll be be coming here on Friday (unclear) picking her up at nine o'clock

in the morning

at night

oh

she thinks she's banned (unclear) she's a Mackem she says she says 'banned'

banned

(unclear)

(unclear) (unclear) with a Mackem

picking her up well she's an (pause) Sunderland supporter (pause) picking her up from Haymarket at nine and then (pause) taking her back (pause) on Saturday and then she's at a concert

mm

and then we'll go out clubbing from there

(unclear) at The Venue like

The Venue and then Limelight's (interruption) (unclear)

why don't you just stay in The Venue

ay

why don't you just stay in The Venue

because it's only open to twelve

is it

Limelight's is a right con we got these fliers right and it didn't say like (pause) what date they were for

aye

what day they were for or like what you would wear so we got there stood like fifteen minutes in the queue (pause) everybody says like it says a pound before a certain time we got there for five to eleven handed them over he says 'eh that'll be three fifty' I says 'well it says a pound' he says 'well it's not valid for Saturdays' (unclear) stood there for fifteen minutes

mm

and (unclear) (unclear) on the ticket (unclear) paying three fifty for like two hours and that was it

it's like when you gan we gan to Madison's like (unclear) (unclear) twelve o'clock to like half past one the doors are still open you still pay a fiver for half an hour

(unclear) kids there last time we went (unclear) 'hold on I'll give you I'll give you all the money I've brought if I can just go in and see my mate' this kid like pulled out ten quid (unclear) he was only in for about ten minutes (unclear) straight back out

(unclear)

I went out with seventeen pound (pause) in South Shields I spent about one and a half rounds right put half and half with the mate like for one round (unclear) five quid that was like three quid like two fifty each and then I bought one round and then I spent more at the fair the next day I spent nine quid at the fair

(unclear) doesn't I wouldn't do nowt like that I don't like fairs or (interruption) (unclear)

(unclear) it was good

(unclear) on Saturday like I bought the round (pause) (unclear) like four people (pause) and like they were all like spirits (pause) and pints so I was I was working (unclear) like six quid (pause) she wants two ninety five I was like

(laughter)

'excuse me I think I'll have another round of them please'

(laughter)

(unclear) wor lass was drinking Purple Passions all night oh they were gorgeous

wor (NAME) got wor (NAME) and his mates got stung on sat eh Friday just gone (pause) (unclear) like you know how it's (unclear) dance floor where you have like the Pils the Castaway or the (pause) Max

aye

well I got the Max which was two thirty for two (pause) and they got eh (pause) something completely different so like it cost like seven quid for like three people

aye

and it wasn't what they wanted

was it not

no they wanted like the Pils for like two two for two thirty and they only got one for two thirty

(laughter)

(laughter)

how'd they manage that like

they got something they got something that wasn't on special

mm

so then wor (NAME) started the tr the treble Bacardis (unclear) trebles for singles

(unclear)

(unclear) was like (pause) ugh

(unclear) it's always cheap cheap the like cheap whiskies and that

just watered down

I know

(unclear) he says 'oh (unclear) gan to Central Park for the pound a pint' he says 'no thanks'

excellent Central Park

it's all right but the music gets a bit dodgy to to start off with then it gets it gets packed (unclear)

(unclear) excellent because everyone gans there before they gan to the Ritzy

it's really really really packed

aye

(unclear) sitting there and you've got your drink right next to your chin you go frightened in case you get like hit

oh we never stood in there we either gan right up the back you know where the (pause) (interruption) bandits are

that's where we were we up beside the the bar (interruption) the bottle bar

the back bar aye (unclear) because eh normally (NAME) not (NAME) (pause) eh (pause) (NAME) used to work in the basement she works up she normally does the bottle bar (pause) and it'll be like 'three bottles' (unclear)

we we just (unclear) there just had whisky races

(laughter) couldn't (unclear)

just just with ice and just whisky straight and

(unclear)

one two three (interruption) (unclear)

(unclear)

the last last time I done that my mate got like (unclear) he was like he had to end up sucking his T shirt because he spilt the lot (interruption) (unclear)

(laughter) (unclear) that's sick

(unclear) got stopped and asked (unclear) eighteen (unclear) there 'got a photograph' 'there' 'okay (unclear) calm down now' (laughter) (unclear) all (unclear) mates didn't have one so they had to go out

(unclear)

didn't have any ID so they had to go out

(unclear) (interruption) shocking

I was like sitting there with like three pints (unclear) 'that's mine that's mine and that's mine'

(unclear) we (unclear) once and eh he goes 'eh we can't let yous all in' (unclear) goes 'why not like' we goes 'we've all got ID' (pause) he goes 'it's not fair because it's all lads we cannot let like a group of twelve lads in all at once' so we gans 'right' so we tottled off again so me (NAME) and (NAME) (pause) walked in he gans 'fine' and then three others (pause) tottled in (laughter)

hum

and he goes (interruption) 'yous are cocky'

Noah's Ark

'yous are cocky yous are cocky like' we goes 'well you said we couldn't all come in at once' (laughter)

we (unclear) Half Moon he just (pause) says 'as soon as you finish your drinks just move'

mm

(unclear) like about twenty (unclear)

the Half Moon's tiny man

it's not very nice drinking here anyway

(unclear) I drink bottles when I gan in there

(unclear) like nine pound for like three people or something for a round

I couldn't couldn't afford to buy a round down there

I just (unclear) gents' toilets (unclear) bar just go like that

mm because like because when you gan in the Groat House they're dead friendly but (pause) they're obnoxious so

I've still got my Basement membership card man

so have I

(unclear)

I'll probably always keep it as memory

as a r as a red (unclear)

aye as a reminder (pause) of what a bad time I used to have

it was bad in there like

(unclear) I used to drink there like all the time

(unclear) I was in there once that was it

(unclear) every weekend every day

I want to try the Boat again (unclear)

you wouldn't get me in there (pause) I'd probably time I'd only go is if (NAME) was if I knew for definite (NAME) was DJ-ing

(unclear) port starboard bow woomsh straight in the water

(laughter) can't get up on deck though

no

it's just like

no just (unclear) my mate because he's running it lately

mm (pause) The Empress is canny (unclear) there

I was there a couple of weeks back (unclear) my mate Mr Quadreen was buying the drinks

(unclear) what

Mr Quadreen was buying the drinks

who's that like

the lad that who whose Boat it is

oh

and then the lad (unclear) that runs it

(unclear)

ehm just have what you want stand behind the bar (unclear)

come out completely blitzed

(unclear) I didn't know if I was still in the Boat when I got home it was like (pause) definitely haven't got sea legs like

mm

(unclear) felt like (interruption) (unclear)

(unclear) like when we went away (pause) to Belgium we went across in the boat it was like that (pause) and somehow my legs just seemed to go at exactly the same time (laughter)

(laughter)

so I was (unclear) (interruption) honestly we got on

(unclear) over to Spain last year just never never slept on the way back

mm

and there was a ferry there a British ferry but the French (pause) security wouldn't let we on

why

they says 'oh it's too full it's too full' but when we got there (pause) (unclear) got there he says 'oh it's not full it's just we don't want to let yous on' so he completely stripped the bus for like drugs (unclear)

mm

didn't find a thing we just had to stand and wait (pause) like I was like I got off the bus and it was like eh I've had no sleep (unclear) 'wee hoo wee hoo wee hoo' it was like a Charlie Chaplin film

(unclear) (unclear) they open the bar at like it's half an hour we were half a mile out (unclear) British waters or French waters so they opened then (unclear) because I'm like nine o'clock in the morning and then all of a sudden there's like hordes of people at bar and you're like

(laughter)

Jesus are these people for real 'let me at the front' (laughter)

it's good on it's good on the bus like because like once you get like (pause) past the (pause) you go on the ferry to c eh (unclear)

mm

(unclear) (unclear) Dover

aye

but ehm like not them that's over sixteen can start drinking and like

aye

you see all these like (pause) over sixteens drinking loads of bottles and that we bought eh (pause) twenty four cases of Sphinx it was like Brown Ale

aye

for a fiver at the French depot (pause) wasn't too bad

(unclear)

(unclear) really tired (unclear)

(unclear) shattered (unclear)

I'll probably never sleep the night though

I (unclear) got to stay awake all day

(laughter) (pause) (unclear)

mm

to try and soften my back up tablets (unclear) and like all the dye comes off on my hands

(unclear) you don't want to just (unclear) (unclear) just put it in your mouth and swallow it

uh-huh I do but (pause) like my hands being like moist (interruption) with sweat

aye

yeuch (pause) they taste nice when they go down but after that your stomach feels empty

(unclear) have to take owt like that

aye well she says they're inflammatory tablets

(unclear)

eh

(unclear)

inflammatory because my back's inflamed

oh

I think (laughter)

(laughter)

that's why my bone's like somewhere out there

(NAME) I don't know why you just don't go on permanent sick

that's what our (NAME)'s on

the permanent sick (pause) (unclear)

couldn't keep my eyes open oh I wish it was Saturday

I don't (unclear) don't want them to come

(unclear) it was Friday night

that'll do me

(laughter)

(unclear) (pause) actually I can't this weekend either because I need my money (pause) (interruption) (unclear) birthday present

(unclear)

oh I wish she could have her birthday (pause) a month after mine

(laughter)

not like four like two days after (pause) (unclear)

this this eh (pause) street's gone right down hill like (unclear)

(unclear)

two Skodas in one street

(laughter)

(laughter)

oh the canniest people on the street probably own them like

apart from my mum

(laughter) (pause) apart from mine and all (unclear)

(unclear) the thir the third canniest (interruption) people

aye

and (NAME) (NAME)

who

(NAME) (NAME) at the bottom (pause) Mr Meldrew man (NAME) (NAME) you know (NAME) down the bottom

aye

(unclear)

(unclear) don't get us confused

oh my back's stiff

I don't know who do you know who's got in eh (NAME)'s house now

you see them on the corner the corner of here

aye

it's their nana

pathetic

her next door's living with (pause) went back with that lad

has she

my mam says 'I don't want to hear nothing about them just don't tell us nothing'

is that who the bairn is that who's (unclear) (NAME)'s father like

no (unclear) his father died

oh

but that's just that's just a proper lunatic that she's going with next door

he looks it

(NAME) doesn't like him

(laughter) (pause) (NAME)'s just tiny

he's like six year old you know

how old is he

six he can't even speak properly neither

well that's their fault that you know

I know they still treat him like a three year (interruption) old

mm

that's the baby for the (unclear) family so like (unclear) (unclear) 'what you say' (laughter)

it's like (NAME) can talk excellent he's only three

oh well 'hi (NAME)' 'hiya all right'

he's got a really (unclear) voice (unclear) like 'ah'

(laughter)

(unclear) (interruption) (unclear)

so has his mam like so

oh (pause) can't say nowt wrong against (NAME) though

(laughter) (NAME) looks a proper gadgie with her uniform on these big shoulder pads (interruption) sticking (unclear) arms (interruption)

(interruption) mm (interruption) she lives up Darras Hall (unclear)

I like her car (unclear) GT

aye (unclear) I found out yesterday my my mate's lass is up the (unclear) and I goes (unclear) and I went 'no' turns out she's only got a month to go